Saving Grace (Safe Havens) Read online

  He smiled, took her hand, and lifted it to his lips. Then he slowly licked the icing from her finger. “Delicious.”

  Before she knew his intention, he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her.

  The sugary sweetness still clung to his lips. Just as Grace gained the courage to deepen the kiss, he pulled back.

  She groaned her displeasure at the abrupt ending to what had promised to be a wonderful kiss. “Adam? What’s wrong?”

  “Not a thing.”

  She lifted herself on tiptoes to try and kiss him again.

  He touched his lips to her forehead instead. “Tomorrow, darlin’. If I kiss you again tonight, I’m going to carry you up to your room and make love to you right now.”

  Adam loved how Grace blushed red at his honesty. Ever so slowly, he’d been trying to overcome her resistance, stoking the fire he felt within her whenever she allowed her guard to drop. A kiss. A touch. A caress. And gradually, she’d responded.

  Now she kissed him back with as much passion as he felt for. Damn, but it was getting harder and harder to leave her at the Four Aces every night.

  Tomorrow, he wouldn’t have to.

  Her eyes rose to meet his. “I–I want you to.”

  Now he’d done it. He’d gone and trapped himself with his own words because he wasn’t sure if she meant to or too, and he sure as hell didn’t want to guess wrong. Turned out, he didn’t have to guess at all.

  She took his hand and led him to the stairs.

  He shuffled along behind her, not entirely sure what he should do. His body was hard and aching, screaming at him to scoop her up in his arms and carry her to her room. Respect told him to wait those last few hours to make her his wife first. He planted his feet and dragged her to a stop.

  She turned and tilted her head. “Y–you don’t want to…come upstairs?”

  Adam called himself an idiot as he shook his head. His gut told him this was some kind of test. Grace might mean to follow through when she took him to her bed, but something told him now wasn’t the time to go.

  “I thought if men wanted to…do…that…they couldn’t stop themselves. Even if the woman…didn’t want to.”

  That statement filled in the last puzzle piece. He finally understood all she been unable to tell him.

  He kissed her forehead again. “Any man who doesn’t respect a woman telling him no is a rapist.”

  Her gaze dropped to the floor. “Some men don’t respect a woman’s no.”

  He prayed for the proper amount of patience to help her through this—and for a way to hide the rage flowing through him at what had happened to her. Should he ever meet the monster who hurt Grace, Adam would put an end to his crimes. Permanently.

  While he wanted to make love to her, he would only do so when she was ready—no matter how long it took.

  He put a finger under her chin and lifted. “I would. I’d respect a women’s no.”

  “Always?”

  He nodded.

  “I–I need to tell you something, Adam. If we’re going to be married, you need to know.”

  “What do I need to know?”

  She tried to drop her chin again, but he gripped it to keep her where she was. Her teeth tugged at her bottom lip and she wrung her hands.

  “You can tell me anything, darlin’. I’ll still love you.”

  “No matter what?”

  “No matter what.”

  “I–I’m not a–a virgin.” Her face flamed a brighter red, and she tried to avert her gaze again.

  He leaned in to brush his lips over hers. “I’ve got something to tell you.” He gave her a lazy grin. “Neither am I.”

  Grace’s eyes were as big as saucers until his words sank in. Then the laughter bubbled out of her, loud and sweet. Such a joyful sound—it settled on his heart, reminding him just how much happiness she’d brought back into his life.

  She threw herself against him, wrapped her arms around his waist, and squeezed him tight. “I do love you, Adam.”

  “I love you too, Gracie.”

  ***

  Storm clouds darkened the sky as thunder rumbled in the distance.

  Grace adjusted her hair as she looked in the mirror, praying the weather wouldn’t portend her marriage.

  She couldn’t think like that. Marrying Adam was the right thing to do.

  So long as her past wouldn’t catch up with her.

  The dress was lovely, the pale pink suiting her brown hair and eyes. Pretty pearl buttons held the bodice together. Lace bordered her wrists and the neckline. She’d left her hair down, and it brushed her shoulders as she moved, longer now than it had been since she was fifteen. The monthly ritual of cutting it no longer comforted her, even though Adam told her he loved her exactly as she was—short hair and all.

  “Grace.” Victoria laid a gentle hand on her arm. “It’s time.”

  Emily handed her a small bouquet of daisies.

  Grace gave her a smile. “Thank you for all your help with the dress. It was very sweet of you to do so much of the sewing.”

  “It’s only fair,” Emily replied. “You did so much of the cooking. Besides, we’re sisters now.” She tried for a hug, but her belly got in the way. “God’s tears, I’m as big as an elephant.”

  Lightly touching Emily’s rounded stomach, Grace smiled. “You’re no such thing. You’re beautiful. Absolutely glowing.”

  A soft knock sounded on the door before Matthew opened it. “You ready, Grace?”

  She nodded, trying to push aside her fears that no matter how much she loved Adam this happiness couldn’t last.

  No!

  Today was her wedding day. She wouldn’t let anything spoil her joy.

  She straightened her spine and squared her shoulders. “I’m ready.”

  Her brother’s reflection grinned. “Damn, Grace. You sure clean up nice.”

  Victoria whirled to face him. “Was that supposed to be a compliment? What a horrible thing to say.”

  “It was a compliment. Grace thought so.” He glanced back to Grace. “Didn’t you?”

  Emily shook her head and stepped between Victoria and Matthew. “Grace is getting married today. You two aren’t dragging her into your fight. For this one day, can’t you two put aside your quarrels and be polite?”

  Victoria bowed her head. “I’m sorry.”

  Matthew scuffed the toe of his shoe against the floorboards. “Me, too.” He sighed then held a hand out to Victoria. “Truce?”

  Her hand hesitantly lifted to touch his. She swallowed hard and nodded.

  “You look mighty pretty, Victoria.” His voice was scratchy—as if he’d just swallowed something rough. He hurriedly turned to Emily. “You’re pretty too.”

  “I’m about as pretty as a buffalo and almost the same size.” Emily glanced to Grace. “The bride is truly beautiful.”

  “Thank you,” Grace said, her voice barely a whisper. “We should be going.”

  She led the way out of the bedroom as Emily followed.

  As Victoria picked up her bouquet and headed toward the door, Matthew reached out to grab her wrist. “Wait. Please.”

  God, he wanted to hold her. He wanted to tell her how beautiful that green dress was on her, how it made her dark hair shine and brought out the color of her eyes. He wanted to beg her to accept him, poor though he was. He wanted to claim her as his own.

  Instead, he lifted her hand to his lips and brushed a kiss over her knuckles. “You’re beautiful.”

  A blush spread over her cheeks. “Grace is beautiful.”

  “She is.” He kissed her hand again. “But you are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”

  She pulled her hand back. “Thank you.”

  “I need to tell you something. I’m leaving in a couple of days.”

  “Leaving?”

  “Grace doesn’t need me here anymore. Now that the cattle are gone, neither does Adam. I–I need to go.”

  She clutched at his hand. “Why? Why do you h
ave to go? Why now?”

  How could he explain to her how hard it was to see her every day and not be able to touch her?

  He squeezed her hand then dropped his own to his side. “Look, I haven’t told Grace yet. I don’t want to upset her on her wedding day.”

  Were those tears in her eyes?

  Of course they were—she obviously had feelings for him. Her kisses had been so hot, so passionate. While that realization made him happier than he thought possible, it didn’t change a damned thing. He didn’t have anything to offer her, and he couldn’t confess all he felt. No, this way was better. A clean break for both of them.

  So why did it feel as if someone had buried a knife in his heart?

  Victoria’s hands trembled as she let her fingertips run over the petals of one of the daisies in her bouquet. “She’ll be heartbroken.”

  “I’ll tell her soon.”

  “I’ll be—” A quick shake of her head before she glanced to the door. “Everyone’s waiting. We should go.”

  Matthew sighed before nodding. Then he followed Victoria out the door.

  ***

  The rain began to fall in torrents only moments after the wedding party arrived at the church, the sound of hail accompanying the wail of the rushing wind.

  Grace turned to her brother. “A bad sign?”

  “Nonsense. It’s just a storm. No more, no less.” He held his arm out and nodded toward the altar. “Adam’s waiting for you.”

  “He’s a good man.” She settled her hand in the crook of his elbow.

  “I know he’ll be good to you, or else I wouldn’t be lettin’ you go.” He cleared his throat. “Grace, I–I hope I did right by you all these years—that I kept you safe.”

  “How could you think otherwise?”

  “It’s hard, you know.”

  “Hard?”

  “To let another man look after you now. But I know Adam loves you.”

  Leaning in, she kissed her brother’s cheek. “I know I probably never said it enough, but thank you. You kept me safe—but more than that, you’ve been my best friend.”

  She tried to wipe away a tear that slid down her cheek, but Matthew held tight to the hand she’d given him and her other hand was full of daisies.

  Her brother reached over to smooth away her tear with his free hand. “No crying. You’re doing the right thing.”

  “Happy tears,” she replied.

  Reverend David gestured to them. Emily and Victoria had already headed down the aisle and were waiting for her. Adam stood to the right, dressed in a dark suit and appearing handsome enough to stop her heart. Jake was his best man.

  Just seeing them together made her heart sing. Without even knowing it, Adam had saved her when he’d accepted Jake as his own and brought him back to Twin Springs to raise. Now, Adam would save her again by making her his wife.

  Wife.

  She was really going to be Adam Morgan’s wife.

  Matthew gave her a gentle nudge with his shoulder, and she threw him a grateful smile. Then she let him escort her to the altar.

  Such a quick ceremony—it flew by before Grace could catch her breath. She recited all the usual vows, not even flinching when she promised to obey him all the days of her life.

  Adam made his own promises as well, to love, honor and protect her, giving a little extra emphasis to that last vow. When Reverend David had pronounced them man and wife, Adam kissed her with enough passion that she sagged against him, forgetting for a moment that they were in a church.

  The wedding party was supposed to head back to the Four Aces for a nice meal and some cake. By the time he led her to the door, the rain had thankfully stopped. The road, however, was a muddy mess from the cloudburst.

  Grace fussed for a moment, afraid her wedding dress would be ruined if she tried to walk across the ruts and puddles to get to the Four Aces. About to lift her skirts and hope for the best, she was suddenly picked up in Adam’s arms.

  “You can’t carry me all the way to the saloon.”

  His kiss kept her from uttering another protest. “You’re light as a feather, darlin’.”

  Victoria’s heart was full as she watched her father carrying Grace across the muddy street. Seeing them together reminded her that there was still love in the world. A squeal next to her made her whip her head around to see Jake sweep Emily into his arms.

  “Jake Curtis! You put me down. I’m heavier than a horse.”

  He didn’t answer, only kissed his wife’s cheek and sprinted out onto the street, jumping puddles when they were in his path. Their laughter trailed behind them.

  Standing by the front door, Victoria let melancholy wash over her. She’d never felt so alone. With a resigned sigh, she fisted her hands in her long skirt and lifted, hoping the mud would wash out.

  As she took that first step, she found herself lifted into Matthew’s strong arms.

  “Put me down,” she insisted. “This isn’t proper.”

  As if propriety had anything to do with why she wished he would set her back on her feet. She couldn’t bear being in his arms, being surrounded by his heat, by his scent. It all served to remind her just what she was going to lose. And, dear God, how could she watch him ride out of her life?

  He grinned and shook his head. “Can’t let you get that gorgeous dress all dirty, especially when you seem bent on bathing in mud so often.”

  She squirmed in his arms. “Put me down.”

  Stopping in the middle of the street, he stood over a large mud puddle. “Put you down? Do you mean it? How about here?” He held her away from his body and feigned dropping her.

  She clung to him. “No! Don’t you dare drop me!”

  Cradling her against him, he asked, “Are you sure?”

  She nodded against his neck, feeling like a drunk who’d been handed a bottle of whiskey. Everything about him filled her senses. Her lips brushed over his skin, sending a shudder ripping through him. That reaction brought a smile and encouraged her to do it again before she grew braver and traced the line of his jaw with the tip of her tongue.

  He groaned deep in his throat and turned his face until their noses touched. “Why did you do that?”

  “Because I wanted to.”

  “God, Victoria. Don’t you know what that does to me?”

  “It makes you want to run away.”

  “What?”

  “It does! Every time we’ve kissed, you’ve pushed me away.”

  “I can’t talk about this now.” With a heavy sigh, he headed toward the Four Aces.

  Her sigh echoed his as he set her back on her feet when they reached the saloon’s front doors.

  As she turned to head inside, he reached for her hand and pulled her back. “It’s not you. It was never you.”

  “Then what is it?”

  “I can’t…you deserve… Ah, hell.” He tugged her into his arms, planting his lips on hers. A long, loving kiss that left her wanting more.

  Finding some courage, she lightly brushed his lips with her tongue. He growled and opened them for her. Lord, how she loved to kiss him like that.

  He eased away first. “I wish… I wish…” He never finished the thought and withdrew from their embrace. “We need to go inside.”

  She clenched her hands into fists, wanting to pound them against his chest to make him tell her all that he was hiding. With as much wounded pride as she could muster, she gathered her skirts in her hands and hurried into the Four Aces.

  ***

  “That was a lovely supper, Grace.” Will patted his belly. “But now I’ve got a hankering for some of that cake. Been starin’ at it since yesterday.” He leaned in and winked. “Only took a couple swipes of icing when you weren’t lookin’.”

  “We were just about to cut it.” Grace glanced over at Adam and blushed at his intense stare, one so full of desire it rose around him like an aura.

  The meal she’d spent all day cooking tasted like ashes because she’d allowed her anxiety over the
wedding night to take hold.

  Her whole body grew hot whenever she imagined what would happen between her and her new husband when they got back to the Twin Springs. God help her, she couldn’t decide if she was excited or terrified.

  So many bad memories threatened to swallow her. Several times since he told her she would marry him, she’d purposefully ignored those frightening recollections. Now that they were actually man and wife, the memories flared back to life each time he threw her a knowing smile.

  She tried to hide her fear.

  His lips dropped to a frown as he marched across the room. “What’s wrong?”

  Grace unstacked the cake plates. “Nothing. Nothing’s wrong.”

  “Gracie...” The back of his knuckles stroked her cheek, and she closed her eyes to savor his touch. “You can tell me anything.”

  She opened her eyes and fussed over cutting the cake as her cheeks warmed. “I–I was thinking about…our wedding night.” The last three words were nothing but a breathless whisper.

  How could she tell Adam about her apprehensions? How could she possibly let him know the shame she’d suffered? It had taken every ounce of her strength to confess she wasn’t a virgin. Only knowing that a couple needed honesty for a marriage to succeed helped her gain the nerve. That courage vanished whenever she considered telling him the whole story. But if she didn’t, how could she explain her fears?

  His hand caressed her cheek. “I’m thinking about it too. I won’t hurt you, darlin’.”

  Grace breathed a shuddering sigh, trying to hold back tears. “I know. I’m just…worried.”

  Tugging her into his arms, he kissed her, long and lovingly until her worries melted and she relaxed against him.

  He smiled down at her. “Trust me?”

  “You know I do.”

  “Then stop worrying and enjoy your wedding cake.” His lips brushed hers again.

  Will rolled his eyes. “Oh, for the love of… Adam, would you quit pawing your wife long enough for us to get somethin’ to eat?”

  Adam chuckled, probably at the furious flush on her face.

  She cut a piece of cake to hand to Will as the rest of the wedding party gathered around to get a slice. After she served everyone, she cut a piece and handed it to Adam.